Thursday, April 20, 2006

Vol 2 - Christmas (28/12/2005)

Hi all,

Last you heard from me I was heading to the old farm back in Werrimull. It hasnt changed much since I was there last.

I had a meeting with my accountant and it appears Chickenhouse Incorporated could be a registered company any day now.

Dad finished the harvest while I was up there. We needed to bring back 2 vehicles from our other farm (its a 30min drive from our main house). So Dad, Dick (the guy whos worked for dad his whole life) and myself headed to the farm in a car. Any road trip of this magnitude requires some refreshments, so I packed some beer (VB of course). Dad scolded me for only packing a dozen cans. One vehicle that needed to come back was an unregistered ute. I only have a UK drivers licence at the moment so I was the obvious choice to drive the ute.

We checked under the bonnet and there was a red back spider (second most deadliest spider in Australia). Dad squished it with his finger. The cabin was also full of spider webs, so I started off nervously down the road (having drunk 2 cans of VB). Now I know what youre thinking, but you're wrong, Dad isnt totally reckless, we decided to take the back roads. After my 4th can I was driving along quite happily when I missed the turn off and headed towards the highway. But I realised my mistake when I stopped choking on the dust Dads vehicle was kicking up.

The next day we headed back to Edenhope to celebrate Christmas with Linda (my sister), Alice (my niece) and Adam (that useless c*nt that f*cks up everything he touches). That day it was 42 degrees Celsius (Thats 107.6 Fahrenheit). I have attached pictures for people who dont know what that hot looks like. You can see the dust storm that was spread about by the strong winds that (according to Dad) would blow Christ off the cross.

Back at the farm in Edenhope we had to catch some yabbies for Christmas day. Christmas was boring as usual. On boxing day Dave (the Local cop) came around, as promised, to catch some yabbies. He brought two mates, one kept talking about how big his balls are since his vasectomy, (I believe the other guys testicles were fully functional but I cant be sure.) To get on their good side I was required to have some of their beers. Dave said I should come to the pub some other time and have a few beers with him. I asked how I would get back home. He said I shouldnt worry about that. Apparently theres a blue light taxi service. Hes a fat, loud mouthed, obnoxious man. But you cant fault his dedication to the job. He said hed have liked to travel to Sydney himself and personally sort out the race riot problem by bashing some Lebanese guys. What a guy!

Hope you all had a great Christmas and have something special lined up for New Years.

Cheers,
Trav

2 Comments:

Blogger adam said...

please stop reffering to me as "that useless cunt" etc. Adam.

9:39 PM  
Blogger adam said...

Travis, please stop reffering to me as "that useless cunt" etc.

9:40 PM  

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